I'm a man, man.
I've got unstyled hair, dirt under at least seven fingernails, and if I don't shower for a few days parts of me stink more than others.

I'm a man, man.
I can act tough, put on some airs, drink at least seven in a night, and if I don't masturbate for a few days I might start to get a little cranky.

I'm a man, man.
And flexing my small pecks doesn't do much but it does somehow make me feel a little more in touch if I secretly do it while watching an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie.

I'm a man, man.
I've got a rock hard, well defined six pack of sexiness stored safely right behind a soft and cuddly lader of packaging... because I don't believe in damaged goods but I do believe in humorous rationalization.

And cookies.

I'm a man, man.
I like chopping wood, being drunk, dumb humor, and stupid video games. I belch, enjoy dirt, have a bad diet, drink black coffee, and gargle whiskey.

I'm a man, man.
My heroes are explorers, famous pirates, pioneers, and drunkards like Frank Sinatra. Yeah - he had a good voice and style but he was also an ass.

I'm a man, man.
I like hammers. And every time I smack my thumb with one I quietly feel validated and manly behind my loud stream of expletives.

I'm a man, man.
And it's not like these things are secrets but in a crowd as touchy-feely as a bunch of poets I feel the need to be a little feely-touchy and I'm well aware that that doesn't make a damn bit of sense.

But I'm a man,  man. And I can can-can. Or I can smash cans - of carbonated beverages - against my forehead.

But I'm a man, man - So I'll grow up, act stupid as much as possible along the way, pick some fights I know I'll lose - pick my nose and flick some boogs - but the most strange and compelling thing about a man, man?

Well that's when a man, man, becomes a man-man, man.

Priorities shift like "do-wop do-the-twist" hips and our man world is shaken.

Love falls down in and if we're lucky there's kids and happiness and warmth and cuddling and all sorts of other things than real men don't care about... but man-man-men do, man.

And well, I guess the thing to remember is - it's ok - even for man-man-men, to pound their chests like silverback gorillas every now and then just because... You know, when nobody's looking,

man.